My friend and co-author Orrin Woodward, and fellow founder of Life Leadership, recently posted an article on his blog about the surprise purchase his wife Laurie made of a custom convertible Dodge Challenger for him. It features a 392 HEMI V8 with a high performance software chip, among other accoutrements. Interestingly, the receiving of his car corresponded almost exactly to the culmination of some customization I’d arranged for a vehicle of my own.
Lemmesplain.
My parents tell me my first word was “car.” I was a HotWheels fanatic, fixed up cars in the garage with my father and brother, and became an automotive engineer. I was born in the same place as General Motors and the UAW – Flint, Michigan, the “Vehicle City,” so I guess you could say cars are in my blood.
There has never been a time in my life when I haven’t been interested in at least several of the exciting new models out on the market. I enjoy vehicles and the engineering behind them, the styling, the performance, the technological advancements. When I lived in Michigan I would often haunt the Detroit Auto Show for all the latest and greatest in the automotive world.
So recently when it became time to choose my next mount, I took some time to be sure I had selected well. After all, there is a myriad of choices available to the afficianado. There are the exotic Italians sports cars, the speedy German sedans, and the muscular American nostalgics. There are also roadsters and coupes, convertibles and hybrids, and now, even electrics. But one particular ride continued to turn my head. It wasn’t all that fast, not very sleak, and has never received very good reviews with Consumer Reports. Just what is this uggly duckling which had so turned my head, you may ask?
A Jeep Wrangler.
This Jeep thing was nothing new with me. I’d owned several throughout the course of my vehicular history. Some say Jeeps are like boats; you’re happy twice when you own them – once when you buy and once when you sell. My experience has born this out to be at least partially true. One I sold in an emergency situation to extract myself from the onset of “sudden college brokeness.” Another I got rid of to make way for a third child. Yet another I inadvertantly gave to a shady character who stole it out from under me. But like Charlie Brown attempting to kick the football pulled away at the last minute by Lucy, when it comes to Jeeps I keep coming back again and again, just sure that this time it will be different.
So I bought a black-on-black Jeep Wrangler Unlimited (4 doors to fit all my kids) “Black Ops” package Rubicon. Perfect, I thought. It had plenty of options inside and all the rugged offroad stuff I wanted on the outside. But it wasn’t long before the old disenfranchisement kicked in. This Jeep was by far the best one I’d ever owned, except for one or two little things. First of all, the engine was a dog. A dead dog. It performed like it had been engineered by the amateur division at TinkerToys. In addition to that, whoever had designed the gas pedal must have previously worked for an exercise equipment company. I was getting leg burn and thigh pump just trying to drive the thing around town. Apparently Jeep drivers are supposed to have legs like Earl Campbell.
Frustrated, I was about to trade it in on a Maserati when someone suggested I “do a HEMI drop.” Upon investigating this unusual lingo, I discovered that many others had come to similar conclusions about the performance of their Jeeps. It seems there is an entire cottage industry that has grown up around the concept of scrapping the wimpy sewing maching parts for good old American V8 horsepower – the famous HEMI engines of Chrysler lore. Thankfully, the engineers who design these engines are NOT the hapless ones who designed the gas pedals. I was sold on this “drop a HEMI” thing in half a second.
One month later I had a 505 hp 6.4 VVT HEMI Jeep, complete with high-airflow hood and throaty custom made stainless exhaust. Oh yeah, and the kind folks at Burnsville Offroad even fixed the overly stiff gas pedal for free. NOW I’ve got the perfect Jeep that fits all aspects of my life. Except, I was thinking, perhaps I should put a lift kit on it and install some bigger wheels and tires, and then maybe a new bumper and brush guard and a winch and . . . .
You might not understand, it’s a HEMI Jeep thing!
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