FailureHere is a brief excerpt from one of my upcoming books (as yet untitled and unfinished):

I
was in a bookstore one day browsing through the section on historical
fiction.  I am a sucker for a
well-written novel set in a real historical time and involving characters from
our past.  Thumbing through the
familiar names of Bernard Cornwell, Conn Iggulden, and Jeff Shaara, I was
surprised to come across a couple of books in this genre by Steven Pressfield.  I knew Pressfield to be the creator of
the story behind the movie The Legend of Bagger
Vance
.  Intrigued, I bought both books and read
them with relish.  They were
remarkable.  They transported me
back in time, immediately got me interested in their characters, and also
taught me much about the epochs in which they were set.  Impressed with the breadth of
Pressfieldโ€™s creative ability, I dug into the story of his success.

Apparently
it was seventeen years of trying before Pressfield got his first professional
writing job.  It was a partnership
on a screenplay for a movie called King
Kong Lives.
  Excited and
confident of success, Pressfield invited everyone he knew to the movieโ€™s
premiere.  Nobody showed.  Not a soul.  Then the review of the movie in Vanity Fair said of Pressfield and the other man who helped write
the script, โ€œ. . .  Ronald Shusett
and Steven Pressfield; we hope these are not their real names, for their
parentsโ€™ sake.โ€  Talk about
criticism! 

Pressfield himself writes of that
time in his life, โ€œHere I was, forty-two years old, divorced, childless, having
given up all normal human pursuits to chase the dream of being a writer; now
Iโ€™ve finally got my name on a big Hollywood production . . . and what happens?
Iโ€™m a loser, a phony; my life is worthless, and so am I.โ€ 

If the story had ended there for
Pressfield, we may never have heard of him.  But something happened.  In Pressfieldโ€™s words: โ€œMy friend . . . snapped me out of it
by asking if I was gonna quit . . . no! [Pressfield answered]. โ€˜Then be
happy.  Youโ€™re where you wanted to
be, arenโ€™t you? So youโ€™re taking a few blows.  Thatโ€™s the price for being in the arena and not on the
sidelines.  Stop complaining and be
grateful.โ€™โ€

Itโ€™s hard to imagine sometimes the
resistance and rejection successful people have overcome on their
journeys.  We look at them and
immediately see their genius, their ability, their authentic swing.  We know them by their Margaritaville.  But excellence comes only after the
long struggle against any and all obstacles that come along.  This is easy to forget when looking
upon someone who has โ€œmade it.โ€

There is another, deeper lesson to
be gained from Pressfieldโ€™s story, however.  In effect, he was told not to waste his failure.  Specifically, he was reminded to be grateful for it!

We have already been through the
discussion about how failure isnโ€™t fatal as long as it isnโ€™t final.  But we need to emphasize here that
failures are extremely valuable if utilized properly, that is, if they are used
as learning experiences and employed in the task of making us better. 

Failures hurt.  In reading the account of Pressfieldโ€™s
first professional flop, it is easy to feel his pain and embarrassment.  But fortunately for thousands of fans all
over the world, Steven Pressfield did not allow his humiliations to define him;
instead, he let them refine him.  The concept is simple but difficult to
live out consistently: our failures should not define us, but rather they should refine us.

Too
many times we allow our failures to go to waste.  As a result of the pain of failing we quit, pout, lash out,
lose confidence, and lose hope.  In
such cases the failures hurt, but they are not allowed to instruct.  They knock us down, but then are not
utilized to lift us higher.  They
make us appear foolish, but are not allowed to help us grow wise.

Author
Frans Johansson wrote, โ€œ . . . groundbreaking innovators . . . produce a heap
of ideas that never amount to anything. 
We play only about 35 percent of Mozartโ€™s, Bachโ€™s, or Beethovenโ€™s
compositions today; we view only a fraction of Picassoโ€™s works; and most of
Einsteinโ€™s papers were not referenced by anyone.  Many of the worldโ€™s celebrated writers have also produced
horrible books,* innovative movie directors have made truly uncreative duds,
megasuccessful entrepreneurs have disappointed investors, and pioneering
scientists have published papers with no impact whatsoever on their colleagues
. . . the best way to beat the odds is to continually produce . . . .โ€

Any
life lived will most certainly come with a litany of failures, mistakes,
embarrassments, and humiliations.  If
we are not mature enough to use these shortfalls as steppingstones, they donโ€™t
find their way into our legacy and are spilled out as waste instead.  In such instances, we have felt the
pain but not grabbed the gain.   

Never
waste a failure.  Wring from it all
the experience and learning you can to come back stronger and better the next
time.  And no matter what, keep
producing. 

Sincerely,

Chris Brady

* He doesn't mean me!

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24 responses to “Don’t Waste Your Failures”

  1. JeanetteP Avatar
    JeanetteP

    Hi Chris,
    This encouragement is so timely and right on! Sometimes being in the valley takes longer than one may expect, but its true, there is always something to be learned. To let setbacks “refine” not “define” you is a great phrase to remember. I’m thankful our Heavenly Father has more patience with us than we do with ourselves. We are thankful for you and Terri and cannot wait to read this new book! Sounds like its gonna be a great one!
    God Bless!

    Like

  2. Cathy - Team Rascal of Rascal Nation Avatar

    Chris,
    What a wonderful post! The new book sounds terrific already! I look forward to it.
    I remember when I was first confronted with this concept. Told all my life I was a failure, my mentor at the time finally looked at me and said things like you did. He said I had failed in my life; that everyone did. (Including himself, which was at the time hard to believe, because he was and is so polished and accomplished!) But then he said that just because we all HAVE failures, it doesn’t MAKE us failures, unless we LET it. Like you, he said if we choose to move on, and let our failures teach us, they can become stepping stones to great successes in our lives.
    It was a life-altering, paradigm-shifting, momentous conversation for me, one I remember like it happened yesterday, though it was almost 15 years ago. It took years to get this wisdom past my entrenched beliefs, and while I still struggle with it, I am now far quicker at reframing.

    Like

  3. Hans Widener Avatar
    Hans Widener

    Awesome! Can’t wait for the new book as I always enjoy your writing, Chris!

    Like

  4. Turhan & Carol Berne Avatar
    Turhan & Carol Berne

    Chris,
    This blog is amazing!! You included some excellent analogies. You have a great way with words that always sheds great meaning and understanding on your topics. By the way, you were awesome in Atlanta on Tuesday!!

    Like

  5. Clint Fix Avatar

    Awesome article! I love success stories. So few people realize that success always follows the pattern than we in LIFE talk about all the time: dream, struggle, victory.
    I can’t wait for your next book to come out. I have always enjoyed your writing and have learned a tremendous amount from you.

    Like

  6. Nicole Porter Avatar
    Nicole Porter

    Excellent!! I needed that today!!
    Blessings!!
    Nicole Porter

    Like

  7. Terri Brady Avatar

    I can’t wait for the next book! If this “appetizer” is any indication, the mail course will be the best yet!

    Like

  8. Jason Fredrick Avatar

    Chris
    It sounds like what you’re saying is, “Never waste a good crisis.” ๐Ÿ™‚
    Thanks for staying in the battle and never quitting in the tough times.
    God bless
    Jason Fredrick

    Like

  9. Matt Mielke Avatar
    Matt Mielke

    Thanks Chris. I’m 44 as of yesterday, my wife and I left our medical careers to pursue building communities. I resonate with Pressfield and all the other winners out there. I am so thankful for your courage and persistence in creating a path that nobodies like me could follow and hopefully make difference in peoples lives for the glory of our Saviour Jesus Christ. Thanks again.

    Like

  10. Leslie Gebhart Avatar
    Leslie Gebhart

    Dear Chris*,
    Great post! Can’t wait for the book. Always love your reminders that God’s delays aren’t His denials. I continue to work on being ‘refined’ ๐Ÿ™‚
    Leslie
    *of course not! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Like

  11. Randy Robson Avatar

    Failure was such a struggle for me in the past. Thanks for this article and your continued inspiration!

    Like

  12. Kim Morisett Avatar

    Awesome, Chris! I am on the journey of learning to embrace my failures as the learning and growing opportunities that they are, rather than allow myself to be defined by them. It is a welcome reframing of my thought process after a lifetime spent attempting to avoid any failures.

    Like

  13. Don Schultz, Team VIP Phalanx Avatar
    Don Schultz, Team VIP Phalanx

    Chris,
    Thank you for the reminder to keep the events of life in proper perspective. We should always remember that God is in control and He has our best interests at heart. He also has said, “I will never leave you or forsake you.”
    With that in mind I should be much more relaxed on the journey of life since I can learn from all events. I just need to make sure that the tough times aren’t a result of unwise/dumb decisions on my part.

    Like

  14. Wes Smith Avatar
    Wes Smith

    That is food for the soul. It’s good to hear these kind of messages. Thanks Chris!

    Like

  15. Malissa Betz Avatar

    Steve Leurquin did a cd called Fail Forward that I really enjoy, referencing I think what you covered here. I love this system and this awesome community. What a great way to start seminar Saturday! Thanks Chris

    Like

  16. Corey McMullin Avatar
    Corey McMullin

    What an incredible way to be reminded and encouraged.Only God knows how timely your words are. Just keep doing what you’re doing!

    Like

  17. Kristen Seidl Avatar

    Awesome post Chris – glad I am right on track ๐Ÿ™‚ Looking forward to this book!

    Like

  18. Jason Dames Avatar
    Jason Dames

    All I can Say Chris is I can’t Wait for the book to come out!!!!! Wow!!

    Like

  19. Antonio Rosselli Avatar
    Antonio Rosselli

    Great leadership-blog … Great blog about re-framing … Great way to give people hope … Ty

    Like

  20. Michael Hartmann Avatar

    “. . . the best way to beat the odds is to continually produce . . . .โ€
    P R I C E L E S S ! ! !

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  21. SJ Barakony Avatar

    The more that is posted about failure NOT being the opposite of success ( which it clearly isn’t – once you self-educate, you learn this. ), the better. That 80-95% of the population that doesn’t yet know this – whether its Pareto, Sturgeon, or E/S v. B/I being the separator – can be reached, one post/book/audio/in person event at a time.

    Like

  22. Carole Eldredge Avatar
    Carole Eldredge

    And TODAY (epic failure number whatever!) I clicked on this blog article. Thank you.

    Like

  23. John Hatchell Avatar
    John Hatchell

    Thanks Chris , for reminding me of all the encouragers that I have around me with the Life Leadership community….even in the adjusting they give you the sandwich we need (claude Hamilton)

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  24. Sonya M Beeler Avatar

    Awesome! Thanks.

    Like

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